We’ve also seen the importance of working out our object relations and the conditioned patterns of our personality as part of the personal, religious approach to the divine, as that too leads to the surrender of the person to the sacred truth. I described how seeing the love of the divine for the individual brings out the love between father and son, and it’s the same with father and daughter. It can also happen the other way around—as you recognize the love between you and your father, then the relationship with the divine can become more of a loving relationship. Either way this makes the individuality, the person, begin to dissolve. In my own experience, this brought out the silver stupa diamond, which brings a state of surrender to divine will. This allows the true individual, the personal essence, to appear, with its feeling of connection to the divine ocean. Surrendering one’s will to the divine liberates the true will, which forges the connection to the divine.  

Since divine love inspires trust and surrender, it functions as the melting elixir in the various difficult stages of the soul’s development. The ego-structured soul is too scared and distrustful to let go of her major defining structures, which makes surrendering difficult. The distrust causes her to identify with these structures even more rigidly, for they are the building blocks of her autonomous existence and functioning. However, when divine love appears in her experience it makes the letting go of this identification and the surrender of these structures much more possible, certainly easier. The presence of divine love, with both its love and light that transcends words and promises, holds the soul and assuages her fear and terror. The most fundamental structures are those of separating boundaries and self-identity, and their underlying ego activity. The loving light of the divine dimension appears when these structures are released. It appears with the integration of the diamond dome, which brings understanding of inner seeking and its ego activity, as well as cessation of this activity at the center of the ego. It arises again with the integration of the stupa, for this is the stage of understanding and transcending ego boundaries and their sense of separateness. 

And now I can feel the sense of an essential diamond in the background, a stupa diamond. In the Diamond Approach, we explore the relationship between love and boundlessness through what we call the stupa diamond vehicle, which challenges and transcends the soul’s deep belief that separating ego boundaries are necessary in order to feel unique and individual. The emergence of an essential diamond basically means that an essential quality arises in a way that brings precise, objective insight. By late afternoon I feel that this stupa diamond, which is silver, has permeated my being. This means that the aspect of personal will is appearing as will that has the precision of insight and the clarity of direct knowing, and I can feel the density, the hardness, and the fullness of it. It feels similar to the will of individuality but without the effort of individuality. The fact that this sense of true will arises as the object relation dissolves shows that the object relation had some kind of willfulness in it. 

A couple of days later I become aware of what I call the pink stupa diamond, which is pink love appearing in diamond form. And that means it brings an understanding of love in terms of boundaries. It’s the full understanding of what we’ve been exploring, the reality that love is not only my essence and my nature, but the essence and nature of everything, including inanimate objects. Love is everything; everything is love. I begin to see sweetness and light everywhere. And I begin to understand that boundaries have no meaning and no existence in the dimension of love.   

Exploration reveals that the concept of experience has been unconsciously fused with that of being an individual entity, that the soul believes she has to be an individual self for her to have experience at all. The realization of boundlessness reveals the delusional character of this conviction, as it sweetly melts away the ego boundaries that give her the sense of entitiness. A subset of this is the concern about not having her own experience, because she believes experience can only be her own. This fear is not exactly the loss of “I,” but of “my.” This possessive tendency turns out to be a distorted expression of the need to have personal uniqueness and autonomy. This reflects a lack of objective understanding of the personal essence, the true individuation of the soul. This understanding is provided by the stupa diamond vehicle, which challenges the soul’s deep belief that in order for her to feel her personal autonomy and uniqueness she needs the separating boundaries of ego. Furthermore, the stupa unveils the timeless wisdom that personal autonomy and uniqueness are characteristics of the personal essence, which does not require boundaries or in fact any ego structure. The soul can be personal, unique, and individuated when necessary, as one of the possibilities of true nature. In other words, because the boundless love is a dimension of her true nature, it is not antithetical to her personal attributes; in fact such attributes are part of its potential.

And then the insight of the silver stupa diamond surfaces, in a way that surprises me. I thought that my true will would be to want to disappear, but the feeling that comes, with a sense of calm, is: “I accept the will of the divine, whatever it is.” This shows a real understanding of true will, and I see the surrender it brings. I don’t say what I want; I say, “Whatever is, if that’s what the divine being wants, then that is what I want to happen.”