Generally speaking, when an adult wants to resist separation and individuation, he resorts primarily to negative merging. Negative merging is still merging. One can always activate it at times of separation anxiety. It is painful, manifesting in frustrating affects and emotional conflicts, but when it is used for defense against separation, one feels mother is around, and therefore feels secure in some way, even though the mother might be angry or hateful.

Separation anxiety is one of the main reasons the Strength Essence is blocked or repressed. There is a cul-de-sac that frequently occurs in relation to separation. One resists separation, due to anxiety or other causes, and thus blocks the Strength Essence. One then feels weak, and unable to separate. This weakness is then taken as the reason behind not being able to separate, while in fact it is the result of resisting separation. It is really the state of the absence of the Strength Essence, and hence it is the state of the lack of separation. This difficulty can be surmounted by confronting the weakness itself. This will then expose the anxiety that led to the weakness. Understanding the source of the anxiety then precipitates the experience of the Strength Essence.